Finding out you are pregnant is one of the most exciting and often times scary moments for a woman. After the initial excitement of being pregnant wares off, many women are left with a lot of fear, anxiety, and apprehension, of their impending birth. When I was pregnant with my first child, I initially had a lot of fear and anxiety about giving birth. It wasn’t until I started doing research on how I wanted to give birth that I started to feel at ease. I decided that for me, the best choice was to give birth with a midwife and to have a doula. I chose to use a midwife because I liked the idea of a more traditional birthing method. The midwife I chose had been delivering babies for 20+ years.. I also chose to use a doula so I had additional support during my labor. So what is a doula?
A doula is a person who is hired, that’s right, you pay this person, money, to give emotional and physical support during labor. Doula’s are also the advocate for moms during the birthing process. Doula’s get specialized training on labor and delivery so they understand all of the stages of birth and know how to offer support to moms during this process. One of the key aspects that I like to point out to people about doulas is they are paid, meaning they work for you. Why is this a good thing? Because you don’t have to worry about hurting their feelings or feel bad cuss you have asked them to do something. They work for you. Now I have heard people tell me time and time again, well my sister is going to be my doula or I have a friend that is going to be my doula, and while these people may be able to offer you support and they may be great at it, unless they have gone through the training to be a doula or have been taught the necessary skills, they are not doulas. Also you tend to worry more about their well being, like are they tired, did you just hurt their feelings because you snapped at them. They joy of a doula, is they expect these things and don’t take it personally. Doula’s also help to make sure your birthing expectations are being followed. For example you don’t want the mother in law in the room during the delivery, the doula will tactfully remind her of this ;), or you don’t want pain medication and they keep asking you if you want an epidural, the doula will help remind the medical staff of your wishes.
I personally have had three children and with my first child I hired a doula, the second time, I had a friend who was a doula assist in my birth, and my third child, I had just my husband and midwife. With my third child I chose a home birth and my midwife was with me the whole time, so I really didn’t feel like I needed a doula, but had I had a hospital or birth center birth, I would have hired one. Hiring a doula is a very personal decision for each family. I will tell you that, having a doula helped me to feel at ease and supported during my births. I also feel like it helped my husband to feel better because he didn’t have all the pressure on him to offer me support.
If you are on the fence about hiring a doula I would recommend just interviewing a few and seeing what they have to offer. Most doula’s offer post partum care after birth as well and this can be just as valuable as attending the birth. To find a doula you can go to http://www.dona.org.
If you have any questions feel free to let me know.
Steph
http://www.primalcotton.com
primalcotton@gmail.com
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